Caregiver from 2015-2017: Oesophagal Cancer
I am delighted to introduce Kimi Shaabi, our 2nd Singapore-based Sherpa. Kimi is a professional counsellor. She has a Masters in Counselling and she has certified in an online Oncology counselling course.
I was a caregiver to my husband Neeraj, who was diagnosed with Oesophagal cancer (Stage 3) in 2015. He underwent surgery, chemotherapy, radiotherapy, immunotherapy and various complementary treatments. Neeraj passed away after 2 years, following metastasis to the colon and liver. I wish I could say something inspiring, but I am still reeling from the loss, struggling through the transition and trying to stabilise the family.
My biggest lessons
1) Future tripping to possible catastrophic outcomes ruins everything.
2) It is incredibly important to remember to nurture one’s relationship with the ‘patient’ because a relationship with the ‘cancer’ is inevitable and very easily overshadows all else.
3) It is entirely possible to be a ‘thriver’ even if you don’t survive the fight.
My motivation to become a cancer-coach
Sharing insights. There are blind spots which no doctor teaches you to address, yet they make all the difference in caring, sharing and coming through this life-altering experience.
My experience at the Coaching workshop
I’m glad I took this leap of faith. ‘Learning’ and ‘Healing’ have been the main themes. I saw how the Survivors/ Thrivers around me hold their experience lightly, as the paradigm shifts from ‘helplessness’ to ‘control.’ Cancer took my partner away, but now I have to admit that cancer has given me purpose.
You can reach any of our Sherpas at firstname.lastname@example.org